Rollercoasters

Two Years Ago

We flew back home on July 30, 2014, from our Montana-Idaho trip.

From my blog:
It’s been a good trip and we are grateful David is doing well enough to be on his own. Thank you to our friends in Massachusetts for visiting him, taking the sacrament on Sundays, and driving him to doctors’ appointments.
And thank you to all our Western family who have expressed their love and support, and have kept us in their prayers.

Last of July, First of August, 2016

On July 22 I drive to the Good Shepherd Hospice in Newton, about 20 minutes away. Jaye, the grief counselor there, listens with empathy and gives wise counsel. Nine years ago her mother died,in her 50s. Jaye knows about grief first hand.
I pour out my heart to her and she listens. Then she gives me an analogy: the first year of grief is like a roller coaster ride in the dark. It can be scary, terrifying at times, but once you are on it there’s no getting off in the middle. You can’t see far ahead of you, you just have to endure it as it comes. During the second year, you’re on the same ride, but parts have a familiarity to them. From time to time the bottom may still drop out, but you’ve survived this ride before, so it’s easier the second time around. As the years pass, the roller coaster never goes completely away, but you may choose to get off for a while. A jarring experience or memory may unexpectedly pull you back onto it, as intense as ever, but later you can get off again.


Day-to-day I’m calm and I certainly manage. I’m certainly feeling an anticipatory dread as the days rise towards August 12th. Will it be as bad as I fear, the next drop? I’ll let you know in ten days.